Updated: Nov 11, 2019
There are a few people in this world who seem to have it all. They have work they are passionate about, they create more income than they can spend, they have deep and meaningful relationships, they have time to do what they love, and they feel great about themselves. We will call them "successful". Famous examples are Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, John Paul Dejoria, Tim Ferris, Amanda Palmer... but I wouldn't be surprised if you knew someone like that in your circles.
So what do these people do, that others don't? I digged into this question and found a number of important factors. To not overwhelm you (I know how short your attention spam is!) I will only share four for now.
It might not be a complete solution, yet I guarantee that if you implement any of these, let alone all four of them, your situation will improve in the direction you desire.
Here we go, highly successful people:
1- Say No, often.
Successful people are ruthless with their choices. They know what their purpose is and what is going to serve it. They hone in on their area of optimal engagement and satisfaction in life and proceed to mercilessly eliminate anything that does not highly contribute to the fulfillment of their mission. They use techniques like the 80/20 Pareto principle or daily/weekly/monthly planning & reflections to "pay attention to the vital few and ignore the trivial many".
2- Focus on VALUE created over TIME spent.
When successful people measure their work, they do not do so in terms of time. Whether they spent an hour doing something or 15, it is of no importance to them. What they care about is the ratio of the VALUE they have created over TIME spent creating it. They aim to be as effective as possible. Some of them have found ways to create tremendous impact in a matter of minutes. This video is a fun interview on Warren Buffet and Bill Gates' perspectives on the Subject.
3- Ask for Help!
With many of my coaching clients, resistance to asking for help has been a recurrent area of improvement. For some weird reasons, it can be very vulnerable to ask for help. Having said that, I urge you to overcome that resistance and try it! My life changed drastically when I started asking for help openly and often. I reached out to anyone who inspired me or I knew could support me in one thing or the other. It has played a huge role in getting me to where I am and will be of critical importance in getting me to the next level. I find Amanda Palmer's book on the subject amazing.
4- Fail often, fail better.
If you listen to all of the commencement speeches on youtube, I am willing to bet you will find more than 80% covering the concept of failure as a stepping stone to success. Steve Jobs, JK Rowling, Neil Gaiman, Denzel Washington...and many, many more, talk about how important it is to try things out and not be afraid to fail. A perfect idea, not executed, never moved a needle. Imperfect ideas however, executed imperfectly many times over, have drastically changed our world. In my opinion, the words of Steve Jobs "Stay hungry, stay foolish" wonderfully summarizes this spirit.
In short, if you ask me, "successful" people have the courage to be disliked. They are not attached to other people's perception of them and the fear of "rejection" is not something that holds them back from doing what they know in their hearts they must do. Even if that initially takes them down a bumpy road, eventually it leads them to their fulfillment.
Here's a challenge for you, choose ONE of those and try it, religiously, for the next two weeks. Journal about your findings.